Nothing, Something, Everything?

"Truth: you can close your eyes to the things you don’t want to see, but you can’t close your heart to the things you don’t want to feel."

"Love's about understanding the other person. Being there for them, talking for hours; making each others’ dreams come true, being in love and not needing anything to keep it worthwhile."
/via (eletheowl.tumblr)


-
2 more days to smth unbearable,
3 more days to the party,
2 more weeks to the crucial thing.

its sucha bad timing to fall sick seriously.
sometimes it irks me how bad an employee i am due to the fact of my weak body.
on a side note, trying to convince myself, maybe im born to be a tai-tai, just maybe -.-

i start to dream big.
now that i finally have smth running through my mind,
ive to wait patiently till i fully recover before i can walk towards my dreams.
uni application all done.
party stuffs all prepared, okay mostly.
please bless me that the crucial thing will go smoothly,
pray pray pray!!
i've got so many things in life that ive not achieved yet.

degree,
license,
clearing all study loans.
my 5digits bank acct,
my childcare centre,
my volkswagen,
my dream house,
my very own family,
my utmost happy future with everyone precious ard me.

all this are inspired by mr soh,
his daily financial planning makes me wanna be someone worthy living in this planet.
i'm gonna plan mine too (:
shall use the shortest year to pay back my study loan.
pray pray pray!!!
hopefully 6years im gonna see some results :D:D

okay dreaming big,
full stop for now.
next up, ways to make my dreams come true ;p

gonna pop pills and see what i can do for today.
sick but no excuse to waste my day away.

xoxoxo.
ciaos.

You need to know.

If you are going to fall in love with me, it’s only fair that you know what you are falling in love with.

You are falling in love with my insecurities, and my obsession with trying to figure out what everyone thinks of me. You are falling in love with my immaturity, my constant need to feel loved and appreciated, my overactive tear ducts, my internet obsession, my tendency to be too clingy. You fall in love with my troubled past, and my hopes and dreams, and how I’m a hopeless romantic at heart. If you fall in love with me, you fall in love with my self-hate and all my imperfections and my perception that nobody could ever love me.

But, you are also falling in love with the way my eyes will smile when I’m with you, the way I’ll text you in the mornings just telling you I hope you have a great day. You’re falling in love with the occasionally humorous and/or thought-provoking things I say, and the way I blush when people ask me about you. But to me, the most important thing will be that you are falling in love with me, despite my thinking that it is impossible.

/via (Eletheowl.tumblr)

*

I have to stop desiring for certain answers.

So true,

ke yi bu yao pian wo ma?

ke yi zai ye bu ying man wo ma?

21yo.

im blogging in the office,
this is how free i am.
im sure this comfort zone will definitely have a change in awhile.
so i better make full use of it now before i complain about how busy i am ltr on.
thank god that mommy accompanied me for lunch, if not i'd prolly die of hunger!
i hope to see things get better in the office.
although i might be here only for a mnth, since ive to go through my major op in april, but i still hope ive a good experience in this new environment :)

hahaha im always this contradicting.
peiru grow up lehhhhhh~ ;p

i cant believe i failed.
now ive to go for 4 compulsory revision lessons,
$240 leh not cheap!!
peiruuuuuuuuu this is bad.
and another $160 for the test!!!
$400 leh, stupid why fail ):
now ive got one more thing lingering on the checklist!!!
arghhh so angry with myself seriously!!!

party stuffs almost done,
thank you for pushing me to get things done.

so since, i cant get any slots for the next tp any earlier than april,
now ive to prioritise & do other stuffs first.
apply for uni!!! :D

okay gtg find some other stuffs to do before boss comes back with work for me to do.
ciaos, hurry 5pm! :)


-
different level of significance,
different kind of treatment.
everything about me can be put on-hold,
but that one thing always has your priority.

Dont ask.

when will that 'one fine day' come?
its tiring me out, seriously.
give me a reason to believe.
i wanna voice it out, but i dont wanna make it worst.
i dont wanna remind you.

i thought it'd get better, but it didnt.
i think my life is in a mess now.
i choke on my own assumptions.

tell me its only pms acting up because i cant find any other better reasons.
suddenly, i just wanna sleep my life away.
suddenly, i just hope my spine miraculously becomes straight.
suddenly... so many suddenly(s).

i think im afraid to face up to reality.
i hate to see changes.

ciaos.
what a way to start off a morning by emoing.
remember, dont ask.