Life's short.

Yes indeed.

So aren't we supposed to live life to the fullest, making happiness the key thing?
I am not sure right now, because things always get so complicated and messed up.

Why cant we forgive faster, embrace happy moments & minimize unhappy moments?

Me, for me.

"You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there."

- Bob Marley

Promise in the dark

Can’t count on you most of all when I really need it
It’s the simple things that you do, really hurt my feelings
The more I try, the more I’m starting to see it
This can’t work anymore, than you believe it

Goodbye may come as a shock
Even though I love you a lot
I’ve given every breath I’ve got
Sometimes you gotta break down and breathe

And how many times I gave my heart
To how many times we fell apart
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don’t promise me

And how many times I gave you me
Divided by so many memories
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don’t promise me

I just don’t know what the problem is, what the deal is
Was I there too much, did I move too fast, I couldn’t see it?
All these promises are probably how you deal with it
I’m tired of hearing you say your innocent

Don’t think I forgot
Because I really didn’t care if you’re lying a lot
I’ve given every breath I’ve got
Sometimes you gotta break down and breathe

And how many times I gave my heart
To how many times we fell apart
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don’t promise me

And how many times I gave you me
Divided by so many memories
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don’t promise me

We all make mistakes
Sometimes we do desperate things
What does it prove? NOTHING
And you never do nothing wrong

Then what took you so long, took you so long
Cuz I keep, keep hanging on, keep, keep hanging on

And how many times I gave my heart
To how many times we fell apart
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don’t promise me

And how many times I gave you me
Divided by so many memories
And it equals
A promise in the dark
So don’t promise me

So don’t promise me
So don’t promise me

General,

Not everything u did out of the verge of anger will make you happy, there's a price to pay, consequences to face.
A moment of folly, a moment of satisfaction.
When you thought those had made you happy, you didn't realize how much it'd hurt as well.
When you thought you boldly done it, when you thought it could have made u felt better.
It all turned out otherwise.

All of us have got lessons to learn in life.
Some harsh, some easy, some effortlessly easy,
So please, when you wanna do smth,
consider the kinda consequences and heartache u might bring to yourself & others.

All this,
I am saying it on a general term, not directing.
And, i wouldn't deny,
I've got a lot to learn as well.

Peace out.

Give me a break.

i cant make sense out of your logic,
because i still feel those are just excuses.
you dont preach what you say,
promises are really meant to be broken anyway.

all this will come to an end.
give me a happy pill.

I need to wake up to something happy,

i don't want you to take advantage
of everything that i've given the 'yes' sign.

PMS.
yes i believed that's what's making me all angsty & upset at everyone.
i need a happy pill.

Making choices.

we shall both put in effort then.
you do your part & i'll do mine.
maybe its not as bad as i thought,
i am gonna give you & me more time to deal with all this.

i want to hold a special part in your heart,
where i've your heart & soul when you're with me.

Low low low~

this is gonna be a self-reflection entry,
you can skip it if you dont feel like reading :)

i feel like im at the lowest peak of my life now, but seriously im aware that im the one who's making myself feel so miserable. well, life goes on i know, and i shouldnt dwell into this for too long. now i'm only hoping that from now till the 20th june, miracles can happen. i would really jump for joy, but the chances are quite slim. however, i am gonna have faith for one last time. on the other hand, i really have to be prepared to handle another round of setbacks.

yes, its an issue to prove how strong i am when such things happened.
true enough, i broke down.
this just proves that im still not strong enough.

its true sometimes there's a need for someone to be harsh on you before you can step out of your comfort zone. yes, it might be me that's taking way too slow to realise all this but sometimes i do really yearn for a lil comfort before any form of words were being thrown unto me. although i understand why sometimes such situation happens, i do still feel i deserve a lil better.

time & time again, i see things in a different prospect. i know its all for my own good, but im always not given a longer time to prove ive been trying and am willing to change.

i know what i want in life, i know there's a need for me to be determined, and i need to motivate myself. who doesnt have to enter this phase of life im facing now? i know definitely there're people out there who is feeling the same. but i havent show signs that ive given up, did i?

maybe i really have to learn how to counter situations like this when my plans dont go according to what i expected.
it isnt too hard to re-plan my stuffs,
all i need is settle my own emotions, i definitely know, i just need a tiny-whiny bit of time to chuck it aside.

its not about the companion of having someone to go to school with.
if thats the case, next intake i could still have my bff, so why do i get upset?

things i thought would happen didnt happen,
but i am still thankful for the words that woke me up from my self-denial mode.

the growing up phase isnt easy, but of course i am gonna fight through it.
school, work, money, driving license, emotions, setbacks, problems, balancing of life etc.

i thank god im seeing my girlies tonight,
cooling period for me as well.

i'm still hoping :)
i'll be fine, am already accepting it.


-
but what still upsets me is,
why do you have to hide your own feelings from me?
do i not worth your time to share it with me?
or i am just not the person you wanna share your sorrows with?
or is it that it wont make a difference sharing it with me or not?
then, the question is, what am i to you?
cant i be there for you?

Leona Lewis ♥

My hands,


Broken,


Cant breathe,

Dont miss this out!

pretty isnt it? :)
loving it just as much as i love it?
then what you waiting for?

keep a lookout at,
http://herwalkincloset.livejournal.com/
http://herwalkincloset.livejournal.com/5545.html#cutid1

go go
support support!
you wont regret it! :D

Dream a lil dream

its always good to have big dreams isnt it? :)

i feel so happy after talking to emily,
its as though ive grown from within.
okay lets shall not exaggerate too much,
i am still not sure how far i can go about sticking to my financial plan.
but im really gonna try this time round :D

so lets say if i really can do it,
i make sure,
i wanna be a successful person in the future.
NU QIANG REN ! :]

- a good educational cert,
- a wonderful family,
- a loving husband,
- wonderful kids,
- a stable career/business,
- owns a car,
- owns a comfy apartment,
- able to provide for my parents,
- able to give my best for my family,
- good savings

maybe there's more to this list,
but i guess, it'd be awesome if i really can 'check' all this in the future :)

SAVE MORE NOW!
LOOKING AHEAD TO A BRIGHTER FUTURE!
WISH ME LUCK.
IM GONNA MOTIVATE MYSELF! :D

Key to my heart,

Needs/Wants?

iphone
netbook
a pair of new flats/pumps
a new bag

hiak hiak~
money drop from the sky please.

needa save around $500 a month after i start work.
possible or not? ):
looking at the rate im online shopping, i think its quite hard.
how how how?
so hard to control!

2 of my 7 loots are here,
pretty pretty i like! :D
all i need to do now is,
GAIN WEIGHT.

looking at the this picture,
i think i really look like a skeleton );

look at the arm, the chin, the cheeks, the fingers/knuckles ):
so pathetic lah! all no flesh ):

anyway im so not looking forward to the 23rd.
dont ask me why, i'm still having mix feelings about it ):
3months will pass fast? hopefully.

P.S - i wish i dont have to grow up.
uni study loan, poly cpf loan, netbook installment, car license, paying of bills, feeding on my own income ):

Before & After

im bored,
so here goes (:

are you amazed?
are you frightened?

hahaa it looks scary to me at first,
and i guess for my case, it was the longest segment they'd ever amended to make it straight again - its T5 to L1'
whichever staff nurse or doc that seen my scar, they'd comment "wow quite long uh"
well, this scar & the metal implants stays with me forever,
and looking at it positively,
its all for the better & ive brave through it :)

shiok shiok shiok! :D

im broke, but still feels happy.
when im well, ive more pretty clothes to wear :)
wheeee hooo!!
ive got 3 items from Eils :)
my bff calls me stupid but i still love her heaps.
see, i so nice, where to find?

i am so excited about my loots,
7 of them!!
shiok shiok shiok!!

okay better write it down before i lose track of all of them and my $$ flies ;p
HWC french lace tunic
HWC tri colour toga
HWC mini floral bodycon
RWB golden buttons highwaist shorts BO
HH lace overlay spaghetti top summer yellow BO
HH summer romper lilac
LP peaches & cream dress

gonna stop buying for now. hhehe.
if not im gonna starve the next one month since my MC ends on 24th May which means i would have no source of income from work.

still,
im a happy girl! :)
xoxo.

Enough is enough.

it all doesnt make sense anymore.
i give up,
why not try feeling my agony?

Thankful, ♥

at the side of my bed, as though telling me;

"Get Well Soon" :)

okay back to topic,

on my actual bday though i'd to spend it at home, most of the time lying on bed & the most tragic thing tt happened was having to faint on my bday.

still, im thankful.

thankful for the surprise bday cake, surprise lil gifts & the coordinating with my mom to ask my bro&family to come over to celebrate with me :)

i'd appreciate that.

im still waiting for my big gift though, wahahhaha!

beware, i look horrible, ): what to do, patient what ;p

my lil gifts, (:

& of course, not forgetting my BFF,
who wrote a post specially for me :)

it was totally hilarious, it brighten up my day definitely.

love you!

as well as, AA & LXL actually send me a parcel just in time for my bday!!

im so happy! they're so thoughtful!!

lastly, thankew everyone for all the bday wishes! :)
i'm more than contented though the day was spent simple. hhehe.
& again, i wanna thank those ppl who attended my bday party, you all made my 21st bday a blast!! :)

gonna work on recovery!
cant wait to hang out and watch movies!! ;p
next up will be time for school & work.
cant wait, hurray!
live my life to the fullest, must! :)

off to read 'Dear John', & when ive finished it, its time to read this 2 books again, they both hold too much of memories! (: oh or maybe 'The Last Song' & 'Remember Me' too. hehhee


xoxo
ciaos.

I miss,

when my world falls apart,
would you come catch me?

19th & 20th birthday was spent awesome.
21st party was awesome as well.
what about my actual bday this year?

I

CANNOT

TAKE

IT

ANYMORE!

I wanna look into your eyes again,

back to square one,
this shouldnt be the way,
return that fantasy to me.

how do i convey,
how do i find my way back there.

it feels like a dream to me now.